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Monday 5th April

Happy Easter Readers!! I hope you have ate enough chocolate to last you until tomorrow! Sadly, I only had one easter egg this year...It was nice and it came with a free Aero cup...There's a credit crunch you know! So it is Easter Monday...Today is the day where hardly anyone works...BUT just so you know, I am on the radio tonight...Just for you!!

If Tony Blair ever owned a posh resturant, I wouldn't go to it! Because three fire engines were sent to Tony Blair's home in Buckinghamshire after the former prime minister triggered smoke alarms while cooking breakfast...See, he can't even cook breakfast without burning it, just imagine what he would be like cooking for 100 people!! Smoke had started to drift from the kitchen into other rooms in their seven-bedroomed house, but the first crew to arrive found no evidence of an actual fire. The alarm was raised by automatic fire sensors at the Grade 1 listed home which is monitored by a security firm. And that shows that there are some people out there, that still care for Tony Blair!!

A spokesperson for the Blairs said: "The Blairs were cooking breakfast when the smoke alarm went off. Because they live in a Grade 1 listed building, the smoke alarm is automatically connected to the local fire station, so the fire brigade sprang into action immediately"...WHAT A WASTE OF FIRE PEOPLES TIME!!

Aliens are out there somewhere unless there is something in the water supply! Unexplained sheep attacks in Shropshire have led to claims that aliens are to blame...REALLY?! Farmers near Shrewsbury have found the animals dead after seemingly being "experimented on"!! THIS IS TRUE!! It sounds like something from an Alien film!!

LITTLE KIDS - THIS NEXT PART IS A BIT SCARY! SO TURN AWAY AND STOP READING if you are a wimp!

UFO hunters are linking the mutilations - including the removal of sheep brains and eyes - to sightings of mysterious orange lights in the sky and claim to have witnessed sheep being zapped by two of the spheres. Phil Hoyle, 53, who has spent nine years probing the riddle of livestock found killed, said: "For a short while it looked more like a Star Wars battle."

He also interviewed farmers and "all but one had had some type of unusual disappearance of animals or deaths with strange injuries". The retired steelworker added: "Animals are being clinically and surgically sampled by a highly advanced technology." OK, I don't think it is something in the water supply!!

Tuesday 6th April

Today is feels like a Monday...Just so you know, its TUESDAY!! Anyway, I am Thin Casey and welcome to my blog. Its all about the elections in the news today...Just so you know, I am NOT going to bore you with all that rubbish news!! Anyway, onto some serious stuff...

When you was at school, did you ever write on your desk?? Yeah of course you did...We've all done it!! Now little kids, if you do go to school, my advice to you is DON'T write on desks! Because a schoolgirl in New York is suing the police after she was arrested for writing on her desk. This is true! Alexa Gonzalez, 12, was spotted penning a message to her friends in green, erasable marker on her table during a Spanish lesson!! Gonzalez, who had written "I love my friends Abby and Faith", was "dragged" to the dean's office and the police were called. She was later taken out of Junior High School 190 in Queens in handcuffs and was held at a local school precinct for hours.

Is it me or do you think a lot of schools are starting to go down hill???! I'm sorry Headteachers BUT THEY ARE! Gonzalez, who had written "I love my friends Abby and Faith", was "dragged" to the dean's office and the police were called. She was later taken out of Junior High School 190 in Queens in handcuffs and was held at a local school precinct for hours. GOOD NEWS: Gonzalez and her mother are now pursuing legal action against the police and education departments in New York City for excessive use of force and violation of her rights. GOOD ON YOU!! I would have done the same!

If you missed the show last night, I spoke about this: A cycle lane which is so short it takes just a second to cross has been branded a complete waste of taxpayers money! Bemused cyclists said that the 8ft-long red and white track in Cardiff is completely pointless. I hate people who are on the council because they always think of something pointless to spend our tax money on!! Kevin Hughes, 47, said he couldn't believe his eyes when the £2,000 road marking appeared.

I see no point what so ever in that bike lane...What about you?? Apparently, this lane is meant to encourage people into green transport...Now how the hell is a 8ft bike lane meant to do that?! Cardiff council, ANSWER THAT!

Wednesday 7th April

Hello my friends!! I must start today's blog by saying that I am starting to get confused with the days already...I keep thinking its Tuesday today but its Wednesday!! I'll be glad when the weekend is here when everything can get back to normal!

If you missed the show last night I told you about this part-time blog writer called Tolly Moseley. She writes on HeartlessDoll.com and recently she wrote a post explaining why big boobs AREN'T awesome. Crazy as this might sound, here are a few of Tolly's reasons why they aren't awesome:

1.) If you show any cleavage at all, you'll always look a little bit slutty.
2.) If you DON'T show any cleavage at all, you'll always look a little bit matronly.
3.) You're bound to get an embarrassing boob-related nickname . . . like, say, "Juggy." Or, "Funbags." Or "Sweater Meats." Or, "Chesty McGee." Okay I'll stop.
4.) Women who are naturally flat-chested are celebrated, but women who are naturally large-chested are called skanks.
5.) Big boobs are high-maintenance, and eventually, it's almost guaranteed you'll have a "wardrobe malfunction."
6.) The obsession with boobs is totally arbitrary.

My advice to you is to treasure those tips and keep them by you!

THIS NEXT STORY IS TRUE!! Two women have been arrested after allegedly trying to smuggle the dead body of a relative on to a flight from Liverpool to Germany on Saturday. The widow and stepdaughter of 91-year-old Curt Willi Jarant have claimed that they thought he was only asleep when they tried to check in at John Lennon Airport. Airport worker Andrew Millea said: "When the family pulled up in a minibus-style taxi, the older lady told me assistance was needed for her elderly father, who was sat in the front seat of the cab.

"She told me that he was elderly and frail, and also very tired, so I would have to lift him out of the taxi and into the wheelchair. I immediately felt unsure about the situation, but I did my best to help by carefully lifting the man from his seat." He claimed that he told airport security about his concerns, after which they checked the man's pulse. He added: "We had to remove the family from the queue and took the man to a side room, where our first aid staff confirmed he was dead."

Thursday 8th April

Hello Thursday people! Welcome to the blog! I think Summer is finally here because its been a lovely day today and for the first time this year, my shorts have seen daylight!! Apparently its meant to get warmer this weekend!!

Now, the Americans are known for going extra extra large on things! A new burger has gone on sale and its called The OMG burger served in Orange County, Calif., is a hefty 4 lbs. -- bigger than the human head!! I don't think this burger will be coming to McDonalds any time soon! This OMG burger has 12 slices of cheese, some mayo and sometoppings and all this between a 14-inch bun!

Now thats one impressive sandwich. Guess the cost!! ...WRONG! Its costs $35 and it can feed eight to 10 hungry people. Sounds good doesn't it!?! If you want one, you'll have to go to America because the burger is too big to come on a boat over to the UK! If you don't believe me, have a look here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUg2wUC8Q...r_embedded

Do you have a Cat or a Dog??? Well would you love to own a Ferret?? Because Ferret ownership is now more common in the south-east than the north - partly thanks to celebrity owners such as Paris Hilton. Possession of the mammals used to be synonymous with the north where 'ferret legging' became popular, particularly among miners!! So Cute they are...

Friday 9th April

First of all, I would like to say "SORRY THE BLOG IS LATER". The weather has been wonderful today and I have been outside all day! Yes I have been wearing my shorts and flip flops again and I have caught the sun!!! This is my first sun tan this year!! God that has made my day because my legs no longer look white as milk! They are brown, aswell as my face!! The weather is meant to be lovely this weekend so if you want to catch some sun, grab a net and get out there!!

If you are a fan of FarmVille on Facebook, becareful with what you do! Because a 12-year-old boy has spent more than £900 developing his virtual farm on Facebook game FarmVille. THIS IS TRUE!! So my advice to you is don't let your kids loose on that game! He spent £625 on his mother's credit card and £288 of his own savings on the game. OUCH!! I wonder what his parents thought when they found out there were £900 short!

If you don't know what FarmVille is,its one of the most popular games on Facebook, allows members to manage a virtual farm by planting, growing and harvesting crops, trees and livestock. New users are given virtual coins to set up their farm, and the revenue from crops can be used to maintain it. But those desperate to progress can buy extra coins using real cash!! Whats the point!?! ITS A FAKE FARM FOR GOD SAKE!!! So if you do have FarmVille and your kids like to play on it, just keep your TWO eyes on them!

BIG NEWS out today, and its about a CAT! Yes, a CAT! Royal Mail has suspended the delivery of mail to a home in Leeds after several postmen claimed to have been attacked by an aggressive 19-year-old cat. Maybe the cat wants a new playtoy...Hmmm! Tiger, owned by 43-year-old pharmacy dispenser Tracy Brayshaw, has allegedly injured three postal workers in recent weeks. Hahaha! Sorry, is it bad to laugh...? Brayshaw said: "Our vet is amazed he is still alive. If Tiger climbs up a tree he is done in for the rest of the week. I find it really hard to believe. The post has been suspended for two weeks. It was funny at first but it is going a bit far now.

"Tiger is 19 years old. He dribbles when he sleeps and snores and he sleeps for 20 hours a day. Royal Mail said they will not come near the house because the cat is far too dangerous." I bet this family don't even get any Christmas cards sent to them!

The Royal Mail has said sorry for the problem and they will start posting mail again soon!

Monday 12th April

Hellooooooo readers, welcome back to the blog, I hope you had a nice weekend!! Lovely and sunny too! Yesterday was the hottest day of the year and I spent most of the day outside sunbathing and now I am looking brown!! Yay! My first sun tan of the year!!

How far would you go to get the thing you love? Because there is this pensioner called Bob piller and e goes on a seven-hour bus journey every week - just so that he can buy his favourite fish and chips!! This is true! I wouldn't make this stuff up you know! The 76 year-old leaves home at 9am every Friday to catch three buses on a £4.45 portion of cod and chips! After eating them by the sea at Hinstanton, Norfolk, Mr Piller takes three more buses home to Dereham, where he arrives about 4pm!! Now would you do something like that???

Bob is now a widow who used to manage a chip shop himself in Norfolk, and he insisted that the 80-mile round trip was worth the effort.

Do you suffer from Wind problems? YES? Well you can always do what Sarah Harding from Girls Aloud does...EAT CHARCOAL!! The Girls Aloud singer reckons that the black stuff helps her stay healthy and has given her back her curves as well and she reckons it has the added bonus of curing horrible hangovers as well as stopping her little windy problems! Sarah crumbles charcoal crumbs all over her meals and reckons she cannot even taste the lumps!! Ewwwwwwwww!!

Oh, if Charcoal doesn't help to get rid of an hangover, have a bacon sandwich because apparently, food soaks up the drink and cures your hangover!!

Do you like drink tea??? I do! If you do, here's something for you, NAAFI tea, surved up to the British Armed Forces since 1921, is to go on sale in Civvy Street to help our wounded heros. The Navy, Army and Air Force Institutes will today launch Naafi Break Tea in 80 Spar shops. The organisation said 50p from the cost of every vox sold would be donated to the charity Help For Heros which aids wounded servicemen and women returning from Afghanistan and Iraq! Fancy some??? But I don't really know if it will taste as good as PG Tips!

Tuesday 13th April

Hello, Hello, Hello and welcome to this thing which we call the daily blog!! If you are a new reader, hello!! Beware, because I do speak my mind here!! You are being WARNED!! Another lovely sunny today, I am thinking about slipping on my shorts and going for a snooze out in the sun before I need to head to MTJR HQ to do this evenings radio show for you!!

Anyway, here is some good news for you if you are blind, or you know anyone thats blind. I promise you, this will make their day! A porn mag has been launched for blind people - with saucy Braille and raised pictures of nudes. Tactile Minds is thought to be the first publication of its kind. See, I told you it would make their day! The mag costs £150 but it is worth the money because there are 17 images for people to touch including a woman in a disco pose and a man showing his six-pack. Founder Lisa Murphy, from Canada, spent two years putting it together.

She said: "Everyone has loved it - even fully-sighted people love it because they can touch it." A partially-sighted London man said: "The magazine is amazing. Blind people have been waiting their entire lives for this."

If you like to buy things on Ebay, becareful on what you say in your feedback because a buyer on eBay is facing a £10,000 lawsuit for leaving a negative comment on eBay. Seriously, this is true!! Michael Steadman, 49, was annoyed when he bought a duff £30 electric clock for his welding business in Florida. He claimed the clock came in three bits and did not work - so he left feedback saying: "Bad seller; he has the ethics of a used car salesman." I think I would have said the same thing!! Millionaire Miami lawyer Elliot Miller, 65, the seller, did not refund him and alleged Steadman of Port Canaveral, Florida, defamed him. Here is one of these people who like to think of themselves!!

When men can't get things they want, they start doing weird things...A man of 66 appeared in court yesterday charged with having sex with a horse and a donkey. Joseph Squires was due to stand trial but admitted buggery and property damage. He was remanded in custody at Leicester crown court. Sorry if you're eating but that is very true!

Homeless Squires will be sentenced on May 24

Wednesday 14th April

Hello Wednesday people!! Welcome back to the daily blog and already we are half way in to the week!! Soon it will be the weekend once again!! Woohoo!! Before I start with the blog, I am starting to get feed up with all the talk on the elections!! What about you?? I don't care about what they are doing...I just want them to do whatever they are doing quicker there are more important things to talk about like some of the stuff thats contained in this blog!

Do you fancy going green all the way with some green eco-friendly curtains??? Curtains made from living plants could be the next big thing in making homes more eco-friendly. YES! This is true!! Plants that absorb moisture from the air and filter light have been made into curtains by a Chinese inventor...Oooh how did I guess that they was made in China!! According to the Austrian Times, the self-sufficient plants are grown on a supporting mesh and could become a popular feature in homes that are trying to go green...Well I guess thats one less thing that will need a spring clean!

Some BREAKING NEWS out today: Butchers at Sainsbury's have been banned from using knives - because of health and safety.
Shopper John Wilkinson was shocked when a meat counter worker at the supermarket said he could not de-bone a joint of lamb.
The businessman was told: 'My bosses won't let me - in case I cut myself and I'm not insured.' Seriously, this is true!! What is this world coming to...I mean how the hell are they cutting the meat and fish now...?? With their hands?!!

Mr Wilkinson, who was buying the lamb joint for a roast dinner at a store in Penylan, Cardiff, said the butcher was embarrassed and said he had been chopping meat for three decades. The 41-year-old said: 'I couldn't believe my ears. He's been doing it for 30 years and we were chatting about how he had been teaching all the young butchers how to cut the meat and joints". So next time you buy some fresh meat from Sainsbury's, it won't be cutting using knives!! You have been warned!!!

Have you ever watching that new 2012 film?? Well here's something that might scare you...A father-of-two has narrowly avoided being sucked into a massive sinkhole which formed a 25ft deep crater in his backyard just seconds after he walked across it. Electrician Ben Luck lived up to his name after the crater, measuring 20ft wide, swallowed up most of his patio just as he went inside his house...That is also TRUE!

Thursday 15th April

Hello you! Welcome to Thursdays blog! There is a lot happening out there today...All flights have been grounded in the UK because of a big cloud of ASH heading towards the UK! The cloud of Ash is coming from a Volcano explosion in Iceland and apparently some of the Ash is heading towards us...So my advice to you is don't empty your ashes out of your fire just yet!!

Anyway, Guys, are you always wondering why your date with a girls never goes well...?? Well, when it comes to dating, a lot of guys shoot themselves in the foot. Then they wonder why they didn't get any, or why they can't meet someone cool. So here are four things that will make any woman think twice about you . . .

#1.) HAVING A GROSS LIVING SPACE. It doesn't have to be spotless, but if a girl's coming over this weekend, clean up the crumbs in the sofa, do the dishes, and get your dirty laundry off the floor. --Having a dirty living space makes it look like you don't take good care of yourself. But it ALSO shows that you don't care enough about HER to clean up a little.

#2.) BABY TALK IN BED. It's endearing with puppies and babies. But most WOMEN don't find it cute. They find it strange, especially if it's in the bedroom.

#3.) EXPECTING HER TO TAKE CARE OF YOU. She's not your mom. And women are more attracted to men who can take care of themselves.

#4.) SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME TOGETHER. In the first six months of a relationship, your serotonin and dopamine levels are a lot higher, which makes you feel good. --The problem is when being around her makes you feel SO good, you want to be around her all the time. And it's easy for one or both of you to get burned out. Most guys don't like needy girls. But remember, girls don't like needy GUYS either.

Guys, treasure those reasons, you never know, they might be able to answer some questions!!


Guard dogs can be as hopeless as my little toe! A pooch on patrol at an English pub lost his job after sleeping through the first burglary at the watering hole in 12 years. Taz got his beauty sleep as thieves made off with thousands of dollars in booze and cash from a charity box. I think its time the pub managers started employing a human to guard the pub!!

The owners say it's probably because the 12-year-old pooch is a bit blind and deaf.

Friday 16th April

Good Afternoon people!! Welcome to Friday's blog!! I can now say with pride, the weekend is here and the weather is meant to be lovely on Saturday!! So there is a lot happening in the news once again with this Volcanic Ash grounding all planes out of the UK and Gordon Brown and the other man...BUT there are much better news out today!

If you missed the show last night, we spoke about this a woman who is addicted to SEX! Now, Wii Fit boards are very dangerous because this woman has claimed that a fall from a Nintendo Wii Fit board turned her into a sex addict. SERIOUSLY!! This is true! I wouldn't make this stuff up! Randy Amanda Flowers said that after the incident she becomes sexually aroused when she experiences small vibrations from food processors, mobile phones and other household implements.

The 24-year-old catering manager from Harpurhey, Manchester said: "It began as a twinge down below before surging through my body. Sometimes it built up into a trembling orgasm. With no cure I just have to try to control my passion by breathing deeply. Hopefully one day I'll find a superstud who can satisfy me."

A doctor reportedly diagnosed Flowers with persistent sexual arousal syndrome as a result of a damaged nerve from the fall. Also Amanda has had many boyfriends but they haven't been able to keep up with a demand, so she is single again and she is looking for a man that will love her and keep up with her wants!

Here is something for the people who think everything is cute...Get ready for the 'Awwwww's' now men - A Chinese woman has adopted an abandoned bear cub which she has put in nappies and is feeding milk. Huang Lijie has taken the bear, which she calls Hu Niu, into her home in Dandong, Liaoning province. She feeds it milk and baby rice four times a day, lets it play with her pet dog and rocks it to sleep each night...Can you hear the "Awwwwing" men? "I made him a wooden box for his bed and since he often wet himself, I dressed him in diapers," she said.

The bear was found by another woman, Yang Huichen, as she worked on a mountainside near her home in Xiaotangshi village. I must admit, that is a nice story to end the week on really!! Thats it!! The blog returns on Monday! Have a nice weekend!!